“Right now we write for any artist who pays us but this is only temporary. What we’re really trying to do, long term, is to put our whole crew of writers behind just 1 artist and have him blow up huge. Once we find this artist, we’ll be cutting ties with every other artist we’ve worked with and writing exclusively for him. Lets label this 1 artist the “PW Artist”

Robbie over at Unkut exposing the “thirst(y) bucket companies”:

It’s recently come to my attention that a new thirst bucket company by the name of Precision Writtens is outchea harassing every second rapper on the internets to employ their services to create the ultimate rapper dude by committee. Here’s the approach they took when they pitched their “services” to $amhill:

PW Talent Agent, Tyrone Bowman: “Ive been listening to a few of your tracks and think you got a tight sound. I’m with Precision Writtens and we write very intricate rap verses for artists. You can listen to some sample verses on our website to get a sense of what we mean by intricate. I know we can help you blow up big, easy. Take a look and let us know what you think fam. Peace”

When Sam declined, they had a second shot:

“Oh ok, are you sure? It’s not about if you write well or not, because you do, no doubt. It’s about the fact that there are thousands of other artists just as good as you. No disrespect, you’re better than probably 90% of artists I see but it’s just the fact that there are so many just as good your chances of making it are very very slim. However if you had 10-15 lyricists intricately putting together every single line and bar of yours there wouldn’t be thousands who are just as good as you anymore, you’d be the best, easy. That’s what we do. Anyway, I think you’re missing out on a big opportunity here but thats cool. Let us know if you change your mind. Peace”

Third time lucky, ya boy Tyrone took to the YouTube to reach out:

“I get where you’re coming from man but that mindset is outdated. The only thing that really matters is the fact that artists like yourself who do their shit the old fashioned way, can’t compete with any artist we’re backing. A 15 man team will always beat a 1 man team. Our artists can put out higher caliber music, 10X as fast. You work your ass off n put out 3-5 albums a year to your fans–we drop 15 without breaking a sweat. It’s like libraries vs. Google fam, so like it or not, we are the future…”

A quick perusal of the PW website, which is disturbingly written in ALL CAPS, reveals what their master plan really is:

THE FUTURE OF PRECISION WRITTENS

Right now we write for any artist who pays us but this is only temporary. What we’re really trying to do, long term, is to put our whole crew of writers behind just 1 artist and have him blow up huge. Once we find this artist, we’ll be cutting ties with every other artist we’ve worked with and writing exclusively for him. Lets label this 1 artist the “PW Artist”. Obviously that won’t literally be the artists name, but it’s just easier to explain things if we label it like that. We’re scouring the globe, looking at thousands of artists in all different countries to find just the right one who’ll be the PW Artist.

They would have gotten away with it were it not for those pesky kids! Surely this is the latest venture from the dummies behind Rap Dummy?

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